Fasten Your Seat Belts, Living With Type 1 Can Be Up & Down
3 years ago today Claudia was in the High Dependency Unit at our local hospital. She had drips and monitors everywhere. Her blood pressure was in the twenties(in her boots).Our beautiful daughter was very ill.We were lucky Claudia made a full recovery. She was in DKA. I was 8 weeks pregnant at the time.
Coming out of hospital was overwhelming, with so much information and very little knowledge about Type 1 Diabetes. In some ways they had made it seem very simplistic, just 4 injections a day and you will be fine.
Then the reality hit. Drowned in information and on many occasions conflicting,we quickly learnt that we needed to provide 24/7 care. On occasions, no matter how hard we tried, nothing seemed to work. What works for one person doesn't always work for another.
To be honest in the early days I suffered from OCD Diabetes and still do on occasions now.I also felt very lonely and had very sad days, wishing things were different.
On our 1st & 2nd "D"anniversaries we have always spent the day together doing something extra special.
I said to Claudia yesterday "do you now it will be 3 years tomorrow that you were diagnosed with Diabetes"? She said " are we going to celebrate"? "Not really" I said. Interesting choice of words I thought.Then I started thinking, yes in a way it is a celebration of how far we have come and how much we have learnt.
Today on our 3rd anniversary. Claudia had been invited to splash world by her friend. She really wanted to go. This is probably one of the hardest decisions I had to make. Swimming can be a nightmare when MR D is involved. It was also supposed to be our day.
I new at some point I had to start letting Claudia go, so what better day than today. So off she went with her friend & her friends parents. I had given them all strict instructions!!(written of course, still a little ocd.)
She also had enough "diabetes kit " to treat the whole of Southport.
I was impressed with myself as I only turned up after the swimming session had finished to change the "plaster" that covered her sensor.I have to admit I did "speed walk" from the car to the changing rooms. Not easy in 4inch heals & very tight jeans. Her levels were great. Did she want to come home ? No, so off she went for lunch and to the beach.
In reality I have had a Diabetes & Coeliac Free Day, which for once has given me time to reflect.No matter what Mr D throws at our family I know together we will challenge every move he makes. Some we will win, other not and often it will be check mate for a while.
I also had mixed emotions, of pride that she managed without me, yet at the same time I wasn't sure if I was ready to let her go.
What our 4th year will bring, who knows! Each year I feel myself growing stronger & getting a little smarter. The sad days are further apart.
Do I wish things were different? Yes I do!!!!!!!!!! Do I pray for a cure each and every day? Oh Yes!!!!!!
The best break through of all for me, are the amazing friends I have made online or met through groups.Through talking to other people that have Type 1 or care for someone with Type 1, I feel reassured that most of my feelings are shared and understood. That is a massive weight off my shoulders.
Through the tiredness, frustration and downright bad behaviour from Mr D. Most of us have a smile on our face every single day.
Oh yes I have eaten 3 chocolate bars today, naughty but nice & fab as comfort food !! In my defence I have just been on the treadmill for an hour.
Bless her she made me a cup of tea and gave me a hug.